Heaven Ministries
November 2009
Volume 8 Issue 66

Marriage Alive! Newsletter   

Marriage Articles

Steps to Heal Marriage After Adultery

Ask Angie
My Husband Blames Drugs For His Adultery- Is This Just Another Excuse?


Should You Get A Swine Flu Vaccination? Watch This Video First

Natural Health & Beauty Products

Secrets To Looking and Feeling Your Best
Free eBook

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Marriage and Health Books

Health and Beauty

Sugar Overload Syndrome
*Do you care about how you physically feel and look?

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* Do you catch the common cold and flu bug easily?

* Have you or someone else in your family been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD?

* Are you having difficulty getting over the physical cravings to alcohol

* Do you think or have you been diagnosed with depression or bipolar?

*Do you want to be in control of your own health?

*Do you need healing physically or emotionally and don't want to take harsh prescription drugs? 

*Do you want to learn simple easy ways to be healthy?

*Are you tired of going to the doctor?

* Did you know that God is our Healer and He gives us the knowledge and wisdom to be spiritually and physically well in Him?

*Well, what are your waiting for? check out Sugar Overload Syndrome: Healing physical and mental disorders naturally!

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Healing Mental and Physical Disorders Naturally
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Journey on the Roads Less Traveled
Take a spiritual journey with Angie

This book is Angie's personal testimony.

"Because of its thoroughness, this book (Journey on the Roads Less Traveled) would make an excellent preparation for marriage, in conjunction with a specific church program, or in and of itself as a private preparation."
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Steps To Heal Marriage After Adultery 

My email is flooded with brokenhearted wives and husbands who are deeply hurting because their spouse had an affair. Last week when I wrote the marriage column for the ministry I included four of those emails. It’s very sad because when these young couples get married they certainly did not expect to be hurting like this.

They want a speck of encouragement, a glimmer of hope for their marriage. Here at Heaven Ministries we can give you some encouragement and even a glint of hope, but for an everlasting marriage built upon commitment and love you absolutely need to seek out Jesus Christ for your marriage and live the design that God created for marriage.

Marriage without God is like oatmeal cookies without oatmeal. Without oatmeal where is the substance that holds the cookie together. In the same way without couples following the principles for marriage designed by God, what is holding them together? Where is the substance, the core, and the basis for keeping the marriage together?

The Betrayed Spouse

Are you the spouse that has been betrayed? Has your husband or wife committed adultery? What can you do? You can allow God to work His will in your marriage. Even if your spouse is in the midst of an affair right now, you can try and find peace through your source—Jesus Christ.

Depend on God

What does that mean to depend on God? Well it means to stop depending on your negative feelings to tell you what to do and how to behave and go to God with your burdens. It means to stop going to friends, family, and others who will obviously tell you to divorce your spouse. Most people depend on the wrong sources for their marriage and they remain unhappy in the marriage, if it even lasts.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
(Isaiah 41:10)

“Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10)

It is through Jesus Christ that we receive our contentment and peace of mind. We cannot look out into the world for comfort because it is not where we find spiritual peace and comfort. God is our peace! Let God Breathe His Peace on You!

SEE: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcyfwiaQawE

Pray For Your Wayward Spouse

Prayer is undeniably a comfort to us in the midst of suffering. Although God hears every word as you pray, don’t expect God to suddenly answer your prayers. It doesn’t work like that. Pray for your spouse to turn from sin and be the loving individual that God created them to become in Him. God shows us how to pray.

It may seem a bit backwards to pray for the spouse who is sinning against the marriage, but this is what God asks us to do. Selfish motives and self-seeking actions that only help ourselves will not get answered by God. If you are looking for worldly answers and advice then go out into the world for your answers. But if you truly want your marriage to thrive and be blessed then go to your source--go to God. 

Jumpstart your mind with spiritual prayer and affirmations After reading this article answer the questions with your spouse and do them.

Make God Your #1 Priority

Have you put God first in your marriage? Why not? If our source for peace and blessings is at the bottom of our priority list, could it be the reason for so much discontent in our marriage? We make God a priority in our marriage when we live by His design for marriage.

God commands for a husband to love his wife…that means even if he doesn’t feel like it. Love is not a feeling—it is an action! God commands for a wife to respect and submit to her husband…even if she doesn’t feel like it. God’s ideal for marriage is a design that works! You can make your marriage work too! Find unity between the both of you—make your marriage important to you and follow God’s will for your marriage.

Encourage Your Spouse to do what’s Right

Notice I didn’t subtitle this section, “tell your spouse what to do”. Instead you should encourage your spouse. So how would you do that? Let them see you working Christ-like principles for yourself. Let them see the light of Christ in your actions. Do what’s right and then let them to decide which way they will go. We certainly can’t make someone do something, but we can offer encouragement through our actions without ever saying a word.

Forgive Your Spouse

Before marriage can be restored you have to forgive your spouse for sinning against the marriage. did you know that true forgiveness heals? It does. Pray about it and ask God to give you the strength to forgive.

To The Spouse Who Committed Adultery

If you happen to be the spouse who committed adultery, pray for your marriage and ask God to help you heal within and stay faithful. Ask God to give you the faith, trust, and hope in Him that you need to stay strong for your marriage. There is no reason for me to bring up “why” you committed adultery and hurt your spouse because I already know the answer to what makes a spouse cheat. But what I’m going to do is offer some principles taught to us by Christ for inner healing and spiritual strength.

If you have been receiving Heaven Ministries marriage column for any length of time then you know how God hates divorce and marriage is permanent. Dependence on God is giving up our pride and allowing God to go to work in our personal lives and marriage. It is doing His will in our marriage because it is the right thing to do.

Give up Your Proud Life and Turn Away From Sin

Once you give up your pride and selfish actions and walk behind God instead of in front of Him you won’t feel the need to cheat on your spouse because, and I think you already know the answer to this, you will be receiving your contentment from the Lord rather than from others. We all want to feel good about “who we are” and some of us go way out of our way to feel that feeling. We use others to receive the admiration and praise we need. But that’s not right.

Our proud hearts is what makes us sin!

This is why God talks so much about pride because it negatively affects our lives and those around us. Pride is almost like an addiction or a virus. But once we can actually give up our pride (past life, patterns, lifestyle, and ways) we realize the power of Christ in our lives!! And we can begin living for Him rather than for self and we truly know what real love is.

How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from God? (John 5:44)

Too much pride in our attitude and beliefs (self-importance) makes us think we deserve to have whatever our hearts desire – we think we are free to have sex with whomever we want even when we are married. But our Creator - our Source for REAL love now and eternal life later has not given us this freedom—we have stolen it!

Love The Wife of Your Youth

Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun. (Ecclesiastes 9:9)

Learn to be committed to your marriage and make your actions speak and show love. Remember love is NOT a feeling but an action. Ninety nine percent of marriage should be be based on actions and not on how we are feeling from moment to moment or from day to day.

How sad it is when married couples do not appreciate and enjoy one another. God blessed you both with each others companionship—learn to show love to your spouse and watch love come back to you.

“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.”
(Proverbs 19:20)

Love The Woman You Married

Renew Your Heart and Mind Through Jesus Christ—Your Source

Two people are hurting. The spouse who was betrayed is suffering and the spouse who feels guilty for the infidelities may be suffering. Ironically you are both pulling away from the source that created you and created and designed marriage for you! You are moving away in your own direction, further and further away from God.

Sermon on the Mount For Your Marriage

What will you do with your lives without God? Without God and without faith you will continue to walk on a road that is consumed with selfish desires. You will never really understand what it feels like to really love someone and be happy. You will always be tempted into lustful situations, even if you remarry.  Without God you will not build the kind of character that knows how to honestly love another. You will not build strength, determination or perseverance.

Choose to love…today!



Secrets To Looking and Feeling Your Best

"The wise man should consider that health is the greatest of human blessings. Let food be your medicine." - Hippocrates

Is nutrition and health important to you? Are you interested in learning the secrets to looking and feeling great? We're giving away a free ebook to a few people who would like to give us a review or testimony after reading the book. Below is the six parts that is inside this ebook. Each part has four or five chapters associated with that particular title. This eBook is filled with invaluable information about nutrition and how food can either work against us or for us. This ebook will be sold to the public for $19.95. If interested in reading this health ebook (PDF)  in exchange for giving us a review contact Angie from the website. Heaven Ministries

Part I: The Fundamentals of Nutrition
Part II: What Does Food Offer The Body?
Part III: Healthful Eating
Part IV: Commercialization of Food
Part V: Let Food Be Your Medicine
Part VI: Ten Guidelines For Good Health



My Husband Blames Drugs on Adultery -- Is This an Excuse?

Ask Angie: My husband says drugs caused him to commit adultery; can this just be another excuse?


Marriage Guidance: Yes, sadly your husband is bringing into play what he has read about drug addiction and then using it as a justification to commit adultery. Alcoholics and drug addicts should be responsible and accountable for their actions. Although, I do believe that addiction does control people’s actions somewhat, but they still need to face the consequences of their actions. Anger controls people’s actions too and if they hurt someone while enraged in their anger should they not be accountable for their actions? Of course they should, and so should the addict.


Addicts love manipulating people and feeding them with “reasons” why they did something wrong against the marriage, but the fact is, they chose to continue doing drugs knowing the temptations are there. Addicts tend to hang around with the wrong kinds of people – people who are also addicts and have loose moral standards. The addict is spiritually bankrupt and needs inner healing, and until that happens they will be facing many more temptations just because of where they hang out and the people they choose as friends.


The simple fact is addicts have episodes of sobriety; therefore, they have the scruples to make the right choices. Just as angry people can choose to get help for their anger, so can the addict choose to get help for his or her addiction. It is up to all of us to make the right choices, whether we’re addicts or not.


Am I being too harsh? I don’t think so. I was an alcoholic for years, most of my choices were the wrong ones, but one day, when my husband stopped enabling those choices and had me stand on my own two feet I chose to do the right thing, and with the help of God, I conquered my addiction and accepted Jesus Christ for my life. Of course, I could not have overcome addiction on my own. I’m not where I am at in my life on my own doing. God is the greatest blessing in my life.


God does not create addicts we create in ourselves what we decide and choose to be. And if others enable that behavior the addict may never become the person that He was meant to be.  Your husband needs spiritual guidance more than anything else and then maybe he can ask God for the healing he needs to conquer his drug addiction.


I am sorry that you have had to endure such a hardship as addiction and adultery. If you want to help your husband you need to learn how to detach from the addicts behavior, stop enabling and rescuing him.  Have him be accountable for his actions – make him be responsible for what he does, and let him face the consequences. And do not blame yourself because it is not your fault.


Our book written for the ministry called The Alcoholism Trap is a great book on addiction that focuses on two main areas of addiction, “how the addict can come out of their addiction to total sobriety” and “what the loved one of the addict can do” to help them.  I have had wives that bought the book and inconspicuously left the book somewhere where the husband will ultimately find it and read when she is not around. Alcoholics that are still in denial will secretly read materials about addiction. 


Do You Love an alcoholic? – Stop Rescuing and Enabling

Do You Love an Alcoholic? - Set Boundaries


Book Resources:


The Alcoholism Trap: Complete book on alcohol addiction in two parts. The first part is written for the alcoholic. Why does the alcoholic drink and how they can beat alcohol addiction for good! The second part is written for the loved one (enabler/rescuer) of an alcoholic. Do you feel trapped with the alcoholic? Do you feel like you are married to a Jekyl and Hyde? You're not alone. You can break free when you stop trying to rescue the alcoholic and rescue you instead!  $19.95 Order - http://stores.lulu.com/angielewis


Take care and God Bless!

Angie and Frank

Promoting Marriage God's Way!!



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