Heaven Ministries
July 2006
Volume 4 Issue 32 

Marriage Alive Newsletter

Stop Analyzing Your Marriage and Start Communicating

Marriage Articles
Stop Analyzing and Start Communicating

Healthy Wise
Margarine vs. butter

Joanne's Devotion
A Majestic Return




Stop Analyzing and Start Communicating


Why do you think we spend so much time trying to scrutinize our spouse and wonder about "why" all the time? Maybe you don't wonder "why" like I do. I'm always wondering "why" my husband does things the way he does or "why” he says things the way he does. It's crazy, I know.

Sometimes I ask myself "why" I spend so much time trying to figure out "why" people do or say the things the way they do, rather than just communicate and ask questions. You see, right now, I'm wondering "why" I do that

I have been told why I wonder about "why" so much.  I have been told that I am a "why" person. Did you know there is "who" "why" and "how" people in the world? I’m a why person. I simply want to know "why" something turns out the way it does, rather than just accept it for the way it is.

Some people want to know "how" it turns out the way it does, and I suspect those people are considered the really curious fellows. I don't care about “how” something is done; I want to know "why" something is done. ;-)


I think it is okay to want to know "why" to everything but "why" can't I just accept things and move on instead of wracking my brain over "why"? Do you know why?


This is what an analyzer does, I think.  They seem to believe they can dissect their spouse and understand the "why's" to why they do or say the things they do.  I would think that it would be best to communicate and ask questions through proper expression rather than only asking "why" all night long.  That would annoy me too.

The problem is, I ask "why” too much. And my husband gets annoyed and says, “Would you stop asking me "why" all the time, I feel like you are interrogating me” Now, I get doubly curious because he never wants to tell me "why", so I figured out a new strategy. I started asking him questions that would invariably lead up to answer my question of "why". 

In other words, I communicate with him rather than always pick and peck his brain for a “why”.  I think that is "why" he got tired of telling me "why" because he felt like I was quizzing him too much. And when I started communicating, he loosened up a bit and I found out "why"! It's great now!


For instance, here is what I ask him when he comes home late for dinner. 


Instead of asking him "why" are you late for dinner, I say, how was your day today? He tells me about his day in a general fashion, but that still doesn't satisfy my curiosity of "why" he is late. So I beat around the bush a bit and ask him if he is tired, hoping that will get him to tell me "why" he is late.  I butter him up a bit and say, "honey you seem a bit stressed around the neck, and can I rub your shoulders for you?" And he says, "Oh, yes, please." I start rubbing his shoulders and I say to him, "Honey, you must have had a really stressful day today, your shoulders are really tense and tight." And he says, "I did have a rough day today, the client gave me more paperwork to do today, and I was on a deadline to get it finished by tomorrow, so I worked late and got it all done. What's for dinner?"


Oh, that's "why" you're late for dinner, I say to myself.


Moral of this story: If your spouse doesn't like answering all of your "whys" and he or she feels like they are being cross-examined by you, try a different approach through communication and asking questions. Get involved with your spouse.  It truly works wonders!



Margarine vs. Butter


Margarine was originally manufactured to fatten turkeys. When it killed the turkeys, the people who had put all the money into the research wanted a payback so they put their heads together to figure out what to do with this product to get their money back. It was a white substance with no food appeal so they added the yellow coloring and sold it to people to use in place of butter. How do you like it? They have come out with some clever new flavorings.

DO YOU KNOW...the difference between margarine and butter?

Read on to the end...gets very interesting!

Both have the same amount of calories.

Butter is slightly higher in saturated fats at 8 grams compared to 5 grams.

Eating margarine can increase heart disease in women by 53% over eating the same amount of butter, according to a recent Harvard Medical Study.

Eating butter increases the absorption of many other nutrients in other foods.
Butter has many nutritional benefits where margarine has a few only because they are added!

Butter tastes much better than margarine and it can enhance the flavors of other foods.

Butter has been around for centuries where margarine has been around for less than 100 years.

And now, for Margarine..

Very high in trans fatty acids.

Triple risk of coronary heart disease.

Increases total cholesterol and LDL (this is the bad cholesterol) and lowers HDL cholesterol, (the good cholesterol)

Increases the risk of cancers up to five fold.

Lowers quality of breast milk.

Decreases immune response.

Decreases insulin response.

And here's the most disturbing fact.... HERE IS THE PART THAT IS VERY INTERESTING!

Margarine is but ONE MOLECULE away from being ! PLASTIC..

This fact alone was enough to have me avoiding margarine for life and anything else that is hydrogenated (this means hydrogen is added, changing the molecular structure of the substance).

You can try this yourself:

Purchase a tub of margarine and leave it in your garage or shaded area. Within a couple of days you will note a couple of things:

* no flies, not even those pesky fruit flies will go near it (that should tell you something)

* it does not rot or smell differently because it has no nutritional value; nothing will grow on it Even those teeny weeny microorganisms will not a find a home to grow. Why? Because it is nearly plastic. Would you melt your Tupperware and spread that on your toast?

Share This With Your Friends.....(If you want to "butter them up")!






Joanne's Devotion



“While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept.  And at midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh, go ye out to meet him.”


Matthew 25: 5, 6

King James Version


Jesus is going to return in majesty one day to claim His bride.  How terrible it will be if we have wasted our lives by not serving the Master.  We don’t know when He is coming back, but He is coming back and it doesn’t matter if we believe it or not.  I am looking forward with great joy to that victorious day.


We need to wake up and realize that there is not going to be any time to get ready.  We will have no advance warning like we do with hurricanes.  We won’t have time to make preparations.  He is going to come “in the twinkling of an eye”.  For those who have not made a heart commitment to Jesus and accepted Him as their personal Saviour, they will not have another opportunity.


We need to be working daily, even hourly, to win the lost to Jesus and we can’t do it by watching television most of the day.  We need to be active in calling people on the phone, sending emails, writing to them by regular mail, and by hugging them to Jesus.  We need to love them to Jesus.


Are you ready to meet Jesus?  You may have made a heart commitment to Him and accepted Him as your personal Saviour but your heart is not right with Him.  If He were to return right now, would you be filled with joy, or would you be filled with sadness because you are not ready to meet Him?  I urge you to be sure that your heart is always in right standing with Him.  Every time I think that I have done something to offend Him, I immediately go to Him and ask forgiveness.  Go to Him now!


Joanne Lowe

June 19, 2006



I hope you enjoyed this issue of the Heaven Ministries Newsletter.
God bless to all of my friends, family, brothers and sisters in the Lord


Copyright © Heaven Ministries ~ Angie Lewis