The Nuts and Bolts of Marriage – Do
You Qualify?
Copyright © 2007 Heaven
Ministries
So you want to get
married and maybe have a family later on down the road. Do you really know what you are getting yourself into? Are
you ready to share a big part of yourself with your future spouse for
the rest of your life? Marriage
isn't about doing what "you" want. It is about doing what
"you both" want.
Are you ready to
humble yourself to your spouse when arguments can't seem to get
rectified? Are you ready to commit yourself to your spouse through the
bad times as well as the good? This is what the nuts and bolts of
marriage is all about. No one says marriage was going to be easy. But if
you want to stay married for life then you need to be committed and
convicted to work at what you started.
Don't be a poor
sport and quit the game early. All marriages, and in any condition can
be saved with the proper resources. The problem is couples are using the
wrong resources to fix their marriage. They don't understand the nuts
and bolts of marriage.
During the early
years of marriage you might see a handsome prince and a beautiful
Cinderella but after going through so many years of behaving selfish and
having unresolved issues pop up, your prince might now seem like an ugly
old frog and your Cinderella may seem to have turned into a wicked
witch. Oh know, now what?
Of course, other
people won't see your spouse in the same negative light as you do. But
that's marriage for you. Unhealthy marriages don't ever see their spouse
in the same positive light as they once did. The reason for this is
quite clear. No
spirituality to base the marriage upon because the marriage is based
upon self-interest. Are you married to yourself? Then go right ahead and continue
supporting the marriage upon your ego.
Many marriages of
today don't even have a bond to begin with. What seems like connectivity
between two people really is lust filled euphoria of the newness of each
other, and after while, especially where there is no love, gets humdrum.
Marriage needs love to survive.
What does marriage
mean to you? Marriage could mean considering the feelings of another and
enjoying the companionship of another. It could mean playing the give
and take game fairly. Marriage
means commitment.
- Are
you ready to consider the feelings of another person? You do want a
healthy marriage, don't you? Well… in a healthy marriage,
selfishness is non-existence! In a healthy, growing and satisfied
marriage, couples do not think in the sense of I, me and mine, but
rather in the sense of, we, our, and us. In other words, it is not what "I" want but
what "we both want".
- Are
you and your future marriage partner compatible? Don't think you can
change the person you married. It doesn’t work like that. How it
does work is both wife and husband find the areas in themselves that
need changing and work on those areas of self so they can become
better marriage partners to each other.
- Are
you willing to compromise with your spouse? A healthy marriage takes
a lot of cooperation. There is no room for stubbornness,
self-righteous behavior, rebelliousness, or selfishness in marriage.
Where are the team players? You can be a great team player
"if" you play the game fairly. If
you cannot play fair, don’t get married! It's as simple as that.
- Are
you prepared to totally commit to your spouse and stay married for
life? I know that NOW
you say yes to that question but what does marriage mean to you?
Answer that and you will know your answer.
What
does marriage mean to you? What does your way of life tell you about
what's right and good for your marriage? Are you going to value your
marriage with the importance that it deserves?
Marriage
will be the most important commitment and promise you make with another
person. If you think that promise is going to get broken, then don’t
even think about getting married, I don't think you qualify.
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