Marriage Healing Begins With Attitude and Beliefs
Copyright 2005 Heaven Ministries

Sometimes we have to do what is right rather than what feels good. If we only do what feels good and what we want, we're not going to be very popular with others, especially the person we married. This kind of marriage will be heading straight for divorce court, won't it? Some of the wrong attitudes we have, and how they can lead us to sinfulness is carried out in our actions, which can cause problems in our relationships. 

Wrong thinking and negative feelings plague many couples today. But they can change this negative thinking pattern by becoming mentally and spiritually healthy through God's message of love. I have never yet heard of anyone becoming healed spiritually, mentally and emotionally that didn't seek out God's message. Some things we cannot achieve on our own. People think they have the will power to stop sin on their own, without the power of God's will for their lives, but this just isn't so. If it were, why is there so much sin in the world? 

We need God! And we need God's Love. Face it, we are powerless to grasp the concept of God's plan for our lives, or to become all that we were meant to be without the source of the Master Designer in our lives. We can say we believe but without actually acting on those beliefs it means nothing. 

Through our own efforts and willingness to seek out what's right for our marriage, we will find that it is a much better way to live, and also where we will find peace and happiness. The greatest part about it is we feel better about who we are as people by choosing what is right, and when all is said and done, we end up feeling good when we do choose what is right rather than what feels good. 

So what is right? What's right is most likely what we don't want to do, but yet we do it anyway because our conscience steers us in that direction. What is right may not feel good to the newbie who is fresh in the Lord, but eventually doing what is right becomes a habit of nature, and this is how you know that you have won over the destructive and negative imbalances in your life. 

Does this mean you will never have a negative day, or use destructive emotions? No way! It only means that now you know how to apply the resources available that before were hidden. Meaning, if we keep God's word hidden, it remains out of our mind. Out of sight out of mind. What is not in our heart, we do not apply into our life's circumstances and issues. 

Many couples carry around wrong attitudes about each other in marriage and they don't even know it. Negative emotions, drunkenness, addictions, sexual sins, immoral behavior, self-righteousness, and selfishness all stem from a destructive attitude. None of these things are right and all of them carry the feel good attitude about them. The thing is, we have choices. We can continue abusing these destructive things in our marriage and life or we can choose to do what is right. 

Destructive attitudes breed destructive actions. Our attitude becomes destructive when we don't allow Gods goodness to permeate our heart and mind. Instead we have made it a habit to live in the damaging influence of our negative emotions. I encourage you, if you have not yet done so, to turn your negative attitude into a positive one through God's message of love. Once you grasp at the concept of God's love for you that is when your mind begins to heal itself and your negative attitude transforms into a loving, positive one. This is what heals marriage. You must heal yourself first, before marriage can be restored. 

Without the Spirit of Christ's magnificent plan in our life we seem to wallow in the negativity in life, and bury the positive with the word of God. I know this first hand, because I have lived in the destruction of my negative and rebellious attitude, and it is not good. It was only when I accepted God (Love) for my life that I was able to forgive myself and start living my life in a productive way rather than in a destructive way. 

If we remain cloudy in our minds, living within our destructive emotions, we do not even know the beauty of anything else. We divorce, remarry, divorce, remarry, become addicted, hate ourselves, hate others, become sexually promiscuous, and live our life in all the splendor of immorality because of never knowing the beauty of another way of living. What kind of a life is that? 

God is love! Love is everything wonderful and beautiful. It is that straightforward. The difficult task for most people is once they have that love, they don't know how to maintain it. God's word needs maintenance. You have to water and feed it daily. You have to weed it several times a day, and once a week you need to prune the dead branches. You have to act on your beliefs!

Guess what? Most people don't do the maintenance, and they are unable to preserve God's love and direction for them, especially under trials and tribulations. It gets snatched away from them because it is weighed down by destructive attitude and negative emotions. 

Through the reading of God's message and living the good life that was meant for you to live by, the spiritual mind overcomes destructive attitudes to such a degree, that righteousness finds itself playing tug of war with destruction and eventually destruction finds itself in the mud. 

I encourage you to seek the light and the truth of God for your life, and pay attention to His message of love. Water that love and self-healing will begin to take place and God's Love will shine through in the person you are. You will have grown into a beautiful and loving person filled with patience, hope, acceptance, and understanding for the person you married, and for all others in your life. 

Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands. Deuteronomy 7:9

Couples Questions

1. How can you choose to do what is right for your marriage rather than what only feels good?

2. How can we keep God's loving guidance wrapped around our heart? 

3. If we read God's Words of Truth every day will that give us our daily bread we need to get through our sufferings?

4. Has my attitude caused me to be disrespectful and unloving to the person I married?

5. How can I heal my lonely heart and begin to work on my marriage?

Answer:
1. Read and study God's word daily
2. Pray to God with your spouse, if possible, every day
3. Try working on doing what is right (principles acts of love) rather than what only feels good to you at the moment
4. Keep God always at the forefront of your marriage - that means at the top!!

6. How can I learn to forgive and get over an awful past with my spouse?

Answer:
1. Ask God to help you to forgive and ask God to forgive you of your sins too. You get over a bad past by giving that past burden over to God - He will take care of you - Let God guide you. Pray for more faith.

You Can Heal Yourself and Restore Your Marriage!